Everything.
I could end this post with that one word, but I won’t. I’m too much of a narcissist. But it’s true, love has everything to do with just about everything. Today was Dallas’ and my wedding anniversary. He’s on the other side of the planet. We didn’t get to talk, but we got to chat over the internet – so I’m not complaining. Something is always better than nothing.
All day long I’ve been thinking about us. The highs and the lows. In the nearly 10 years we’ve been together we’ve seen our share of both. I love him completely. Even when I hate him – which can be all-consuming. Seriously.
Love isn’t easy, at least not in the long run. Marriage is hard. Marriage, jobs, kids, buying houses, moving, dealing with in-laws and friends, managing money…it’s all hard. Harder than any single person could ever imagine.
Introducing your family to your beloved is easy. Coping with the intricacies of relationships with in-laws is hard.
Deciding on a job is easy. Deciding if that job is worth uprooting your family is hard.
Earning money is easy. Deciding how to spend that money is hard.
Having a baby is easy. Raising one is hard.
Disciplining children is easy. Coming to an agreement on the best way to discipline them, based on your separate childhood experiences is hard.
Marriage is impossible.
It is, it’s impossible. But lots of us do it, every day we choose to stay married. Lots of others choose to walk away. Perhaps the going gets too rough. I get that, but sometimes I think they just don’t try hard enough. Married people are working. Almost every second of every day they’re working to stay together.
Maybe that’s why so many people get divorced, they don’t want to try so hard every day. Dating is fun. It’s supposed to be fun. You’re supposed to spend every second with or thinking about being with the person who melts your heart. They’re perfect and you want to tell the whole world about the awesome person you’ve found.
Hold on to that.
Because one day when your boss is being mean. The kids are making you crazy. The car needs $1,200 worth of repairs. The dog puked on the carpet. And you’re exhausted. You’ll get into bed and that person next to you will be breathing so loud you’ll want to shake the ever-living-shit out of them.
But instead, you’ll remember dating. And fun. And how awesome you thought they were.
And instead of strangling him, you’ll go to sleep.
And try again tomorrow. Because marriage is worth it.
Happy Anniversary, Dallas. Thanks for making me not want to strangle you most nights.
I completely agree and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
Thanks!
Happy Anniversary!!
Gracias:)
Happy Anniversary to you both!! To this day, one of the most meaningful weddings that I’ve seen.
Thank you Amber! I’ve always been glad you and Andy shared that day with us!
As your deployment husband, I am so glad I got to spend the day with you on your anniversary. Now, if only you would let me come over for some snuggles…and hugs.
Thank you and you’re gross.
Well. You’re mean. There, we’re even.
You’re also awesome. So there.
Ok. Truce!
Well said my friend, well said. Happy anniversary to you both. I hope it feels just like dating again when you see each other in summer!
Me too! Thanks:)
You are so wise. I love you. Happy anni to you and Dallas. xxx
I love you too! Thank you!
Happy Anniversary.I loved every point you mentioned. It’s all so true.Marriage is worth it, when both parties work on making it work, otherwise….
Of course!
Amen, sister. Happy Anniversary my friend.
Thanks friend:)
Happy Anniversary to you and Dallas…
Thanks Kelly!
Well said! Happy Anniversary!
Thanks Audrey:)
How lovely! Honest and beautiful. Happy anniversary and congratulations, it’s an achievement!
Every year…every day really is an achievement in a marriage!
Absolutely perfect. Happy Anniversary!!
Thanks Mel:)
Happy Anniversary to you and Dallas!! You’re awesome, and make me smile everyday. You make me remember when my twins were small and adorable and, I swear it, spawns of the devil at times!! Love your blog!
Thanks! It’s great to hear that you relate to the twinsanity!
Happy anniversary! If you could amplify that picture that would be great. You both look so good that deserves to be admired.
p.s. I can see feet there. LOL
Thanks, I tried to enlarge it and it got all pixalated. You’ll have to squint;)
PS I know, aren’t they gross?
Happy, happy anniversary!! You’re so right, staying married means hard work and I completely agree that you have to work at it constantly, but I have to play devil’s advocate here, when marriages end it’s not always about not trying hard enough, sometimes there’s simply nothing left to work for.
I love what you said about jobs, money, babies and discipline… had never thought of it that way but it’s so, so true!
You’re absolutely right Yara. I said maybe – I know that not all marriages are salvageable-sadly.
XOXO Friend!
Happy Anniversary Bridget & Dallas. I love this post, it’s so true. Marriage is hard, yo.
It is hard, yo!!
Happy Anniversary! Marriage is hard no doubt but worth it… most of the time.
Haha, true! Thanks Meredith!
Happy anniversary and all…really, I mean it, but can you go back to that part about having kids being easy….cause I’m a little skeptical of that one.
Not to scare the snot out of you friend…but compared to raising them? It’s a piece of cake.
I am not a crier. But this?
Well…
Cheers to the impossible, my friend.
With much love.
Thank you. Married people are superheroes. We should wear capes instead of rings;)
I always say that if marriage were easy it would be SO boring. I don’t like boring.
Happy Anniversary to you two!
Boring is not fun! I like fun too:)
Thanks Jamie!
Happy anniversary! I hope he comes home soon.
Thank you Stephanie!
Happy anniversary! It is worth it. There aren’t many other people I’ve cared to hang out with for 15 years, I consider Dumb Dad lucky. And so am I:)!
Mine is pretty lucky too! (So am I!!)
Right on! You hit the nail on the head. Perfect way to sum up marriage.
Thanks, I hope it doesn’t scare any single people off;)
Happy anniversary, lady! Marriage IS hard. Real hard. And I’m so glad you don’t want to strangle your hubby “most nights.”
Happy Anniversary! This is a perfect and honest description of marriage. I loved it!
Well-said! Happy Anniversary
H a p p y
A n n i v e r s a r y !!
You’re FabULOUS. <3
Happy anniversary! May you have many, many, many more.
Hope I’m not too late in wishing you two a Happy Anniversary. Ah, who am I kidding, toast to it anyways – Happy 10!
Happy anniversary B and Dallas! So true! Every bit of this post is so true. I hear you most on coming to an agreement on the disciplining part.
[...] Because marriage is nearly impossible. [...]
LOL – awesome description of marriage. I do think a big part of it is just making the decision – every single time weary and duty dreary day – to Stick! and whenever my DH starts getting on my nerves, I do make a very real effort to remember what I fell in love with in the beginning. you so have to hold on to that.