John has a new trick. He learned it while at an overnight camping thing with our church. (From an adult, who I think may have been having his own contest to see how many dumb things he could get the teenagers to do.) John lets mosquitos bite him. Then he pulls his skin taut so the mosquito cannot get his nose out of his skin. He thinks if he holds tight long enough the mosquito will suck so much blood that it will explode.
There are a lot of things wrong with this theory. The first is letting a mosquito bite you – he refuses to put on bug spray. The second is trying to make it explode. Even if it works (which neither he or I have seen happen in person) you’d wind up with your own blood splattered all over your arm.
Last week we were in Talkeetna, AK doing the tourist thing with Jen. John decided to try to get a mosquito to explode. I watched and video taped the experiment. It didn’t work and I won’t torture you with the video. But, he sat there for several minutes holding his skin tight so the mosquito could take a nice long drink.
While this was happening an old lady tourist walked up. She was very excited about the big mosquito. VERY, VERY EXCITED! She took out her camera and asked if she could take a picture of the mosquito. She zoomed in uncomfortably close to John’s arm and took multiple shots.
It was weird and funny. Tourists are entertaining that way.
John (being a smartass) asked her, “Do you have a blog?”
She replied, “Yes, yes blog…Facebook…yes I’m on Facebook.”
She then snapped a few more pictures of the mosquito just as it dislodged itself from John’s exploding arm trap and flew away.
As old lady tourist walked away she turned back to John (whom she had never introduced herself to) and said, “Are you on Facebook?”
John said, “Yep.”
“Oh good, you’ll be able to see the pictures then.”
Who’s dumber? The teen who lets himself get bit by mosquitos or the senior citizen who thinks all 500 million people on Facebook are looking at her photos?