This week’s list comes from The Mannahattamamma and the great Nora Ephron. Ms. Ephron passed away recently of cancer. After her diagnosis she made a list of things she would miss and things she wouldn’t, if the end came today. The lovely Stasha has chosen the same list for us.
I’m cheating. You only get a list of things I won’t miss because I don’t want to have to replace my Macbook due to water damage from me blubbering all over it while typing the list of things I will miss. However, since there are five other people in my immediate family, I’m sure you can guess.
Top Ten Things I Won’t Miss If J.C. Calls Me Up Right Now
10. Mosquitos – Unless one will actually explode on John’s arm, I see no use for them.
9. The Kardashians – Any of them.
8. People who take their dogs everywhere – Listen, I love my dog as much as the next guy. Maybe. But when I have to trip over dogs at fairs and other events I get annoyed. Leave them home. Thanks.
7. Annoying people – So…pretty much everyone except my friends and some of my family.
6. Gardening – I hate it. Every year Dallas insists on planting a garden. Then he leaves and I have to tend to it. This year he actually suggested starting it while he was home on R & R. No thanks. I’m more of a sit-on-the-porch-and-drink-beer-girl than a root-around-in-the-dirt-growing-things-these-dumb-kids-won’t-eat-anyway-girl.
5. People with allergies – Except Dallas, who is allergic to everything. Including dust. Obviously he married the wrong person.
4. Wrinkles – I have them. They’re not laugh lines, they’re wrinkles and they suck. Yes, Nora – I feel bad about my neck too.
3. Rachel Ray – She’s the reason people say dumb things like Yum-O And Sammy’s (instead of sandwiches). Also, half her recipes don’t work. I want to throat punch her.
2. Teenage Smut Television – Taryn watches the worst programs ever; The Secret Life Of The American Teenager, Pretty Little Liars, & Gossip Girl are the worst. When I was her age I watched cool shows like The Facts Of Life and Family Ties.
1. Rush Limbaugh – He’s the worst person ever.
What would you not miss if today was the last party?