As a mother of four I don’t get much time to myself. We recently declared the bathroom off limits to the twinkies while I am in there. At six they are probably too old to see Mom in the shower or on the loo anymore. At least, that’s the excuse I’m using to get a few sacred moments of quiet during the day. That brief reprieve is usually met by several knocks on the door and at least one person waiting outside for me to do something terribly important like get down the crayons or cut up an apple. That’s why I was somewhat grateful for recent car trouble.
My car trouble was a true first world problem. The bluetooth in the minivan stopped working. I can’t possibly be expected to drive to school, the gym, the commissary, soccer, and the liquor store without my iPod blaring through the speakers. If for no other reason than to watch the boys rock out to “Low” or anger the teenagers by playing a constant loop of Gary Allan. It had to be fixed. I made an appointment and went to the dealership at my assigned time. I figured the problem would be a quick fix, maybe 20 minutes to reset whatever needed reset and then I’d be on my way. I’ll admit, I looked forward to those 20 minutes of quiet. One of the best things about our wired society is that hardly anyone tries to strike up conversations in waiting rooms anymore. I like that. I don’t want to talk to anyone anyway. I want to read my book or scroll through the internet unfettered by children and dogs and husbands.
It’s an unspoken rule, isn’t it? Doesn’t everyone look forward to a little peace and quiet? Even though my last visit to the dealership was a gross feet fiasco, I had high hopes that this one would be better.
Unfortunately one woman did not get the memo. Instead of quietly playing games or reading on her smart phone or tablet (she had both) she decided to talk on the phone. Loudly. VERY LOUDLY. She made three phone calls, all of a very personal nature, all in her loudest voice, all from the waiting room. It was almost 40 degrees in Anchorage yesterday, that’s practically summer – there’s no reason she couldn’t have gone outside. Or emailed. Or texted. Or Facebooked. Nope, she talked and talked and talked.
I wanted to shake the shit out of her.
This was all made worse by the fact that it took them two and a half hours to figure out what was wrong with the van. (The didn’t fix it, that’s next week because they had to order the part. Stupid Alaska) Two and a half hours of listening to this idiot woman talk about her knee surgery, her cousin in the nursing home, her love for her friends, and then recap it all over and over. Who does that?
I’ve never been so hateful of mankind in my entire life. That’s really saying something considering I’ve attended concerts and professional sporting events. If you own a cell phone understand this, you are not on a reality TV show. There are no hidden cameras waiting for the next juicy bit of gossip. No one, I promise no one wants to hear your telephone conversations. If you must talk on the phone, go outside so you don’t bother the rest of us. Because seriously, I only get so much time to myself each day and if you ruin I will cut you.
I absolutely LUUUUUUUVVV those times BY. MYSELF!
I “apparently” tend to loud talk on the phone/cellphone according to the spousal unit. Therefore I hate to talk on the cellphone for fear that I am one of those loud talkers but am then accused of being rude by said SU. WTH!?!?
I’ve had that happen…usually in a restaurant…..and usually about some gross medical problem. Yuck
And details of their finances… OMG, the things people share with the world!! I think airports are the worst. Talk about being a captive audience!!
Oh Bridget, your observations are mostly correct, but your diatribe is so very awful, but in a really funny and self-satisfying way. And the cats are over the top. Tough meetings today and tonight. You really gave me a laugh and I need to laugh right now. Thanks.
Do I really need to comment. I think Grumpy Kitty summed up my comment.
Oh hell no. I’m sorry your quiet time was ruined! Also, that cat is my fave! How does he always know what I’m thinking?
Ah grumpy cat always says what I am thinking! I used to look forward to going to the dealership alone and just waiting, but now I have to take the kids with me. So it’s not fun anymore. Although I did go get an oil change alone the other day. It was a nice 10 minutes to myself!
These people always manage to find their way to the library, which annoys me off to no end! One guy actually came in & asked if he could Skype on our computers. HELL NO! What makes you think we encourage you to TALK, OUT LOUD, in the library, on video, for you to disturb everyone around you? Clueless people piss me off!
I’m not terribly bothered by people on the phone. I think I’m more annoyed by people having inane, factually inaccurate conversations with one another in restaurants, or stores, or wherever. Those people I want to kick in the mouth or just yell at them to shut the F up.
I’ve been watching a lot of White Collar lately and keep wishing I had one of those devices that jam signals… so useful in waiting rooms, and on trains, and buses, and taxis (yes taxi drivers on cell phones are really very relaxing…). You could have had so much fun, letting her start a conversation and then jamming her cell phone signal… over and over, watching her frustration grow, rather than your own! and very relaxing!
p.s. need your opinion on something so come over and read this please : http://thebonnybard.com/2013/03/07/437/
also, if you feel like fbing it I’d be so grateful as can’t use my own facebook friends… (if you don’t, I don’t mind!)
Love Grumpy Kitty! Always says what I’m thinking. How about people who bring their kids with them and THEN get on their cellphone and completely ignore them? I was waiting for hubbie to get done with his cortisone shot in the spine. Yep, I said shot in spine. Shivers! A woman walks in with three, yes 3 kids under 5 yrs and proceeds to get on her cellphone and talk VERY LOUDLY in Spanish, completly ignoring said kids, who are now climbing the furniture and walls. She then went outside to smoke and talk, leaving the kids inside! One was hacking up a lung and wiping her nose on everything in sight! Gross!! I gave the receptionist my number and told her to call when he was done, and went and sat in my car. The best part is….the woman asked me who was watching her kids as I walked past her!!! I just gave her the finger and said this ain’t a daycare, it’s a dr office! I’ve been dying to tell my WTF story all week!! Lol
Phones are not for talking. Duh.
I haven’t seen all those Grumpy Cat memes yet. Good ones!
You mean you didn’t want to hear about the lab results of her most recent bowel samples? hahaha! Sadly, I think I could be that woman sometimes. Not because I mean to- but my voice is louder in public than it is my own head. haha! But, you still like me, Bridget, right?
1) 40 degrees is FREEZING.
2) Sometimes when I come home from work I stay in the car in the driveway because it’s quiet and still. And the house is not. And then my husband comes out the front door looking for me because he knows I’m home. How does he know? The stupid dogs keep yelling at the front door in barkese “She’s home! She’s home! She’s home! She’s home! She’s home!”
Horrible, horrible people and their BORING cell phone conversations – my husband tells them outright, “Shut the f- up,” and strangely they do. Might help that he’s bald with lots of tattoos.