Jen is still here visiting. We met in the summer of 1995 while we were both working at Lonz Winery in Ohio. We have a long history of consuming alcohol together. Some of it we can even remember.

Since I have a giant rhubarb plant (that grows despite my complete neglect of all plants) in the backyard we thought it would be fun to make a rhubarb cocktail recipe. It sounded like it could be good. Maybe. Possibly. With enough rum anything could be good.

The cocktail is called Rhubarb Shrub. I thought it was called Rhubarb Scrub, because I blog when I’m drunk.

Here are the main ingredients.

I know, it looks gross. We had faith. The directions said to chop up half a rhubarb stalk in a mason jar. Then add two cups of apple cider vinegar. I think it called for one cup of dark Jamaican Rum. Since Jen bought Puerto Rican Rum instead we just filled the rest of the jar with it.

The rhubarb needed to steep for 24 hours.

Upon opening the jar we were hit with the most foul vinegar scent either of us had ever smelled. My children immediatley ran for cover in the basement. It didin’t work because the scent wafted downstairs too. We both tasted it before adding the sugar and boiling it.

This is Jen’s reaction:

It was not good. I’m not sure any amount of sugar could help it. But we soldiered on anyway. Jen strained out the rhubarb.

Next she added one cup of sugar.

We brought the mixture to a boil and simmered it for 10 minutes. At this point Jen’s family back in Ohio could smell it. They called to complain.

We did another taste test.

Still a teensy bit vinegary.

Jen added more sugar…

We boiled some more, then put it in the freezer to chill. We don’t have much faith in this drink, so we moved on to an easier recipe.

Since we still wanted to use the lovely summer rhubarb we added it to our cocktails.

This is what nearly 40-year-old women do on vacation. Get drunk and blog.

Before we were done with our rum & cokes with a rhubarb twist, the shrub was cool enough to drink. The recipe said to add more rum and serve 1 part shrub to 4 parts club soda. We decided to try it without adding more rum because we were afraid of running out of rum before we were drunk.

This is the taste test:

     

Verdict: Shrubs are neither refreshing nor tasty. We’ll stick with drinking rum & coke, wine, and beer. Leave the vinegar for douchebags.